Twiddle My Thumbs

There are often days when I wonder what the heck is going on. Or for that matter why everything happens for a reason or why people function the way that they do. Now approaching the end of my first year is a really great thing because this has been an amazing year. And a really quick one. There are really big things that are occurring and coming up in my life that I am really excited about. There are like wise significant changes coming. However there are things in my life that I continue to feel like I am at the end of my rope. But that feeling comes in and out. I have days that things I feel are really clear while there are days that I feel so confused. Those are the days that I really want God to intervene and be like Hey Emmaleigh here is what is going down. Here is what is coming. But he isn't going to do that. I understand. But I have been praying that I would have become more patient and I have seen the opportunities that God has given me for those things. Yet there are just those days when I say grr and just really want a definate answer. But I feel like there is probably something at my end that I am just not understanding or something that I am just not doing right. I wonder if I am praying right or if I have my words all mixed up and I am asking for all the wrong things. I don't know I just feel really confused and I wish I didn't. But then I guess I should pray about that too. = ) I think one of the most difficult things is that I have had the opportunity to have something that I really enjoyed and now I long for that same feeling back and it's not coming in "my" time frame. God has things planned for me in his time frame because he knows what is coming or what is going. That power is so amazing. Because God is amazing. Everyday there are new beautiful things revealed to me. I wish I could just apply it and keep up. I have noticed as I get older and the factor of time becomes more prevalent your mind starts to work a little differently in the sense of priorities. Oh growing up......