We're floatin like a bubble

On monday I had a movie due back at blockbuster at noon. So I woke up early with ever intention of returning it on time. But that just didn't happen. After that I decided that there was no point to rush and get it back so I took my sweet time getting ready. I got up that morning and just really wanted to spend time with God. I grabbed my Bible and devotional and when i looked at the cover of my devotional I noticed for the first time that it says "youth devotional". So I opened it up and the first page read that this book was given to me in 2001.....7 years ago. As I flipped through the pages to the right day I saw that almost every page was highlighted and had notes and when I got to the right day it was already highlighted and when I started to read I realized that I remember this lesson. At that point I said to myself....I think it's time for a new one. I went into town to the family christian bookstore and no joke, sat in the devotional aisle for an hour. I read a page out of all of the book except 7 of them. I also prayed and asked God to help me to pick out the right one. I didn't want just an easy read with a minimal lesson. I wanted a devotional that would help me grow. After that hour I found one and I think its pretty awesome because it has a devotional for the morning and evening of each day. So it encourages you to spend even more time with God. And after a small lesson it asks specific question that apply to your life and gives you room to right. I thought it was sweet.

While I was checking out up at the registers I noticed these little Bibles just off the the side so I picked one up just to see what it was and it was just a small ESV of the Bible. Just being curious I asked the lady working how much they were, and she said they were $5. As I started to put it down and forget about it the words flew out of my mouth like I had no control that I would take one. And I was just like ummm okay. So I ended up with another Bible and I wasn't sure why. But when I was driving home I thought about why I did it. Last week at camp I would offer to read a passage at our morning meetings out of my amplified Bible and one girl was like well my translation is completely different from yours so here is what mine says. And I was just kinda like yea this version is so different because it is more for study, and it is probably going to be a lot different than the versions that my campers will have. So that was a reason a long with the fact that if I ever meet someone that really needs a Bible I will be able to give them one because it cost me nothing and its going to help someone SOOO much. So I thanked God that he had me buy that.

That night I was also hanging out with some of my friends from home and we were all over at my house and I just kept looking at my Bible and devotional and I just wanted to read it so bad. I was glad to see my friends but I really wanted to spend time with God, it was such an amazing feeling. I also told my friend all about how I got the little bible and my new devotional and she and I really never talk about that stuff because she is catholic and we never talk about it. So it was really cool that I was so bold to just say it. God is so amazing.

Two more things to share....I wrote a poem today and I just wanted to put it on here because I couldn't find my poem book at the moments. And a you tube video that I watched about 15 times today because I had a rough morning and this guy really helped make today better.

Poem....
bon ami
vous etes proche

bon ami
vous etes extreme

bon ami
vous etes vrai

bon ami
vous etes faux

bon ami
vous etes pas

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A2eJlkk7nf4

Therapuddy.... does nothing.

So for the past two or three years my wrists hurt constantly and they crack SO loud...it's nasty. I have a high pain tolerance so I didn't really do anything about it, I guess I just always thought it was normal since all of my bones crack that loud. However, none of the rest of them have the pain or are as frequent as my wrist. So this spring I went to my doctor and played him the lovely sound of my wrists and he looked at me and goes "emm thats not right" and I said "yes doctor perry....I've noticed" So he told me that I needed to get an X-ray so we can see what is going on. I got the X-ray and that didn't show anything so I got an MRI and that didn't show much except the fact that my ligaments and tendons are really weak. So my doctor decided the best thing to do would be to get physical therapy. I just kept thinking seriously what is that going to do because moving them hurts and every activity I did in high used my wrists and that made them strong. So I listened to my doctor seeing that he has gone to medical school and went to physical therapy.

So I went and my physical therapist took all the these measurements and whatever and she just sat there for a second and asked me for the like 4th time, "you don't take any pain medication for this?" and I was like no I just deal with it. And she was like I really don't know how you do it. So she started to explain to me what is going on the cracking she believes is from a little bit of them grinding on one another because there isn't enough ligament support there. Then she told me that this physical therapy really isn't going to do much. And I just sitting there thinking...I was right. She told me we can strengthen the muscles that are in my forearm but besides that there isn't much she could do. So she told me about prolotheraphy where you get injections in your ligaments and the make them bigger so they can support better. And I was like well that is going to hurt a little bit. And she told me out get like 10-15 shots in different spots like 5 times. I was like okay yes, maybe something that can help. Debbie Downer point- its like $100 each time and insurance doesn't cover it at all. So that is like $500 out of pocket. ouch. So my therapist gave me some exercises and a deep tissue massage on my arms. Then I got this stuff called therapuddy which is just silly puddy. But so far...no changes.

What have I gotten myself into?

I have been gone for a week to SpringHill and now I am already back at home. To get to this end result I think I have to back to a week ago when it all began. I left last friday afternoon to head up north for a week of all staff training at SpringHill camps so I could be a counselor for the summer. On my drive up I just continued to get more and more nervous about everything that was going on, it really felt like it was the first day of college again for me. I got up there and everyone was going crazy excited and I got through the whole registration process and went up to Copper Country, my part of camp where I was going to be staying. I am not going to lie when my mom left the homesickness started to set in, I was alone with people I didn't know in the forest. And the rest of that night really sucked because I felt so alone. As the week continued we got deeper and deeper into material and we all definitely got deeper and deeper into our relationships with God. However I am still struggling. I have learned so much in the past 7 days that I am completely overwhelmed. There are SO SO SO many details to the job. Not only sticking to your schedule, not losing campers, making sure everyone eats, looking for abuse, knowing where ever shelter area is, what sound means what, what games to play, who needs medication, how to deal with a "dead squirrel", oh and don't forget that you need to give these children so much love and the great news about God and help them every step of the way. It is seriously intense and it is all for the springhill experience. I seriously got so intimidated and weak and had pretty much decided that if after 2 weeks I just couldn't do it I was going to quit I just couldn't handle it. On top of that finding out that my brother would be married on the 20th and I wouldn't be able to attend really made me want to live. OH don't forget the Tornado that hit our camp and took down half our forest and cause MAJOR problems. But mid way through the week our camp director told us that we only have 70% of the campers coming so some people were needed at the other divisions of camp and some people where going to go home. So i came home, their burden was my blessing. But I just don't know if I want or am supposed to go back I need major guidance this week.

What a week, but why?

Obviously I made it home from Europe, and whenever I get back I am always really cranky because I don't like the fact that I had to leave. England is my favorite place that I have been to thus far. What I really like about it is that there are definitely differences from here and there but there are also so many similarities, and don't forget we speak the same language. That earns a gold star. This trip was very different from the other times I was there I only went into London for a day and the rest of my trip was in small English towns west of London. I may have liked that even more than London. It was such a blessing to be there again. When I am there I have no stress and I wake up every morning with a smile for the pure satisfaction of just being happy where I am. I always wonder why God has sent me the places he has. So far I still haven't been able to figure out why I have gone to Europe 3 times and why I have such a great passion for it. While I was there I really started to question this and asked God to show me why he has sent me there. God gives us specific desires, and likes and being there is definitely one of them. One of the reason I know I was there was the opportunity to spend time with my aunt, another was to learn more because I love to learn about history and there is no way you can escape history while you are there. But I just kept thinking while I was there that I just hate the fact that I never know when I am going to go back and the truth is that I want to be there all the time.

So that got my brain going with what I am planning to do with my life or where God wants me to go. I started thinking about teaching, and it is an excellent and amazing profession but I just kept thinking about the truth of it. When you become a teacher you life just sort of settles. You are in one spot for quite sometime and you fit into the mold that is built for you. I am really not sure that is what I want, well right now. I really can't imagine just settling when I am 22 and being okay with it. I don't feel okay with the thought that I won't be able to travel and explore and expand in the ways that I want. So I am praying that God show me the right path and will help me in being able to do what is right for me and be in the right place and use my gifts.

All in all my short trip was great. You can see all my pictures from my trip on facebook. :-)